What makes you an awesome parent?


I got treated to a coffee date with one of my dearest girlfriends Saturday. After speaking to her Friday and letting her in on my need for a break she asked me on a date so we could chat and catch up. Since our move last summer I haven’t really been able to see my friends on a regular basis – we’ve all got a ton going on and with this new distance between us it’s a little difficult to get together as much as before. So, this was an extra special treat. Naturally, the conversation came full circle and we ended up talking about our kiddos (break right?). I told her about my blog and how I write about how damn hard parenting is sometimes and she stopped me dead in my tracks by asking me what makes me an awesome parent.

Well shit, do you know that I really didn’t know how to answer her? I just looked at her dumbfounded and in that moment I realized that I don’t give myself enough credit for the parts of motherhood that I’m actually pretty good at.


I don’t have it all figured out- nope, not even close but I am doing the absolute best I can. There are days that I consciously ignore my kids saggy diaper butt to avoid another diaper change meltdown. There are also days where she watches more T.V than is recommended and we don’t delve into book reading, creative activities or momtastic activities like foot painting or glitter gluing.

There are days that my brain, heart and body are just tired and you know what, I think that’s okay… sometimes.

There are bad days and there are good days and on those good days I’ll tickle my little girl until she laughs so hard she cries. Those days are the ones where I let her explore, make messes and let her just be her – in all her messy glory. Those days actually happen more often than they don’t. So, maybe I’m being a little too hard on myself.

After much thought and reflection this weekend I came up with a random list of reasons why I’m an awesome mum to Margs. I think “us” Mums/Dads are far too hard on ourselves and often fail to see and acknowledge what a good job we do most of the time. We are good enough – we just have to stop, take a deep breath and appreciate it more often, don’t we?

Let’s have at it, shall we?

/ I am an awesome Mum because I’ve created and maintain a safe physical and emotional space for Margs

/ I am an awesome Mum because I love Margs unconditionally and always put her first

/ I am an awesome Mum because (despite my type A personality) I’m allowing Margs to “fall” so she can teach herself to get right back up again (both figuratively and literally)

My friend reminded me to stop and pat myself on the back every now and again so now I’m going to do the same for you – some days we just need that extra shove to put it all in perspective.

Now, I absolutely, categorically insist that you share why YOU are an AWESOME parent too!




Leave a comment

  1. February 13, 2017 / 7:29 am

    Hmmmm….lets see….. I am an awesome mom because…. I go the extra mile to create fun things to do with the kids… lip sync videos, snow sculptures…I’m the mom who climbs the playground equipment and gets stuck upside down and they laugh…. I also have an open trust/honesty circle with my girls. They know they can come to me about anything and everything and I won’t get mad if they are honest and we always have open and honest discussions.

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:46 am

      Love this! You’re so creative! Well done!

  2. February 13, 2017 / 7:56 am

    Love this! Why is it so hard sometimes to think about those awesome things we do as parents? I’m an awesome parent because I’m flexible and patient with my daughter’s high-energy-no-napping personality, and because I pour my creativity into her education at home. Thanks so much for posting this. So encouraging!

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:46 am

      Well done mamma! no-napping personality must be so incredibly difficult!

      • February 14, 2017 / 12:23 pm

        Thanks! Right back at ya, too – letting kids figure out how to fall and get back up (whatever the obstacle) is tough! 🙂

        • February 15, 2017 / 7:25 am

          It is so so hard. Sometimes I have to consciously convince myself to let her go at whatever she’s doing and not interfere. Baby steps 🙂

  3. February 13, 2017 / 8:02 am

    It is so hard to admit when we do good. I feel like a failure so many days, but really who doesn’t? I’m an awesome parent because I always put my kiddo first even if it means skipping out on something I’d love to do for me, because I play all the boy parts in his games so he can get his imagination blooming and because he is my heart and soul (even on days when I just feel like locking myself in the bathroom and shoving chocolate in my face)

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:45 am

      Yes, I feel like a failure often too! I think that most parents feel that way on the regular and it’s so unfortunate.

  4. February 13, 2017 / 8:33 am

    I personally didn’t see the “good” job my parents did with me until I was into my early 20’s. They were always there, more when I needed them and a gentle reminder when I didn’t. Reflecting now it felt like a safety net that allowed me to push into life with the knowledge that if I fell, they’d be right behind me if called to help. I do the same thing with my daughter now. She knows I’m there if she needs me but I don’t approach overbearing. I’ve also discovered through trial and error that I can reverse a bad mood by being silly and including her in the silliness. Recently that has been singing in the car when it’s just the two of us; a bad version of Car Pool Karaoke, lol. My parents did a good job with me and that has translated into me doing a good job with my daughter, with a few bumps of course, no one is perfect.

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:45 am

      I find this so interesting. Thank you so much for sharing. Car pool Karaoke is awesome – I do it a ton too!

  5. February 13, 2017 / 8:40 am

    I’m an awesome mom because my kids can stop me dead in my tracks . It can be an awards ceremony , a game , a class party , a cry , a hug , a kiss or even a dirty diaper lol I make it work . I rearrange my day to be present and when I can’t I make sure my presence is felt . My kids know they are loved and they have a safe and supportive environment to ensure that they can become all the great things I’m not .

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:44 am

      Being present is so important! Thank you for sharing!

  6. February 13, 2017 / 9:04 am

    Jenny! It sounds to me like you need to make time to connect with your friends more often. It was good for your soul!
    I’m an awesome mother because I’m pretty real with my kids, they’ll still tell me their secrets (at 10 almost 13!), my kids still want to hang out with me, I do give myself time without husband or kids, I can just feel it! Thanks for pushing me to put that in words! Cheers to parenthood!

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:43 am

      I do! We’re going to make a point to get together more often now!

      Thank you for sharing! I love your reasons – it’s so important to be real with our kids!

  7. February 13, 2017 / 10:50 am

    This was a really hard exercise! I think that the level of difficulty of listing the reasons why we’re good parents shows just how important it is to do…

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:43 am

      It is really hard! I had to think about it for a day to come up with my reasons!

  8. February 13, 2017 / 11:19 am

    Thank you for this post & for inspiring us to do our own lists of awesomeness! I’m an awesome mum because I make time almost every day to give special attention to each of my daughters – a cup of tea after school with Eldest, a game of baby dolls with Little One. I’m awesome because I have been open about my mental health with my girls and enabled them to talk about how they feel when I am unwell. I am awesome because I want to keep learning as a parent and treasuring each new stage. I love fiercely and deeply.

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:42 am

      I love this. I don’t have experience with more than one kiddo at a time and I think this is such a great way to devote a little extra special time to each. Well done momma!

  9. February 13, 2017 / 12:26 pm

    I am a good mom because I am a safe place for my daughter. I have struggled with anxiety my whole life and I am proud to be my child’s emotional safe place.

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:38 am

      I love this. As an anxiety suffer I completely understand how/why this is so important. Well done!

  10. February 13, 2017 / 12:43 pm

    Thanks for this!! We ALL need to feel proud of not only our kiddos, but also ourselves. I might just borrow this topic for an upcoming post 😘. And YOU ARE awesome — I can feel it even over vast interweb space.

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:37 am

      Feel free to borrow! Thank you!

  11. February 13, 2017 / 12:52 pm

    You are right. We never give ourselves enough credit. I have so many people telling me “I don’t know how you do it” referring to my life with an autistic son and most of the time I’m confused about what they are talking about. I don’t think I’m “doing it” at all. I just try to get by each day. But I look at my kiddos and I see well-rounded, polite, empathetic, happy, funny, imaginative people, so I guess I must be doing something right. I don’t know what it is except to love them no matter what.

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:37 am

      You are awesome! Thank you for sharing!

  12. February 13, 2017 / 2:10 pm

    Great post! I’m an awesome mom because they still want me to tuck them in at night – and they’re 11 and 14 years old.

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:37 am

      That is an awesome ACHIEVEMENT! Way to go mama!

  13. February 13, 2017 / 3:21 pm

    I’m a great mom because I care. I care what they think, I care what they feel, I care for their safety, I care for their health, I care for their happiness. I might not get it right all the time, but I care. So I keep working at it…

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:36 am

      I love everything about this!

  14. February 13, 2017 / 3:27 pm

    Love this post! It sounds like you had a great time catching up with your friend and yes we all definitely need to take the time more often to think about why we are so awesome as parents! I am an awesome Mum because I always plan ahead so T can have the most fun possible when we are off together, play dates, walks, park trips or just dedicated playing time it’s all happy memories made and I hope she will remember the effort I always made when she’s older.

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:36 am

      This is wonderful! Thank you for sharing!

  15. February 13, 2017 / 4:05 pm

    Great post! I’m an awesome mom because I let my baby be her.. I let her be messy, have fun, laugh, explore, sing, dance.. I’m an awesome mom because I become a child with my child!!

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:34 am

      I love this!

  16. February 13, 2017 / 4:32 pm

    Great post. I was feeling guilty after a challenging day with my toddler. Thanks for reminding me that I’m an awesome mum because I love her unconditionally and would do anything to make her happy.

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:34 am

      You ARE an awesome mom. We all have those days and it’s okay.. it really is.

  17. February 13, 2017 / 7:10 pm

    I enjoyed this. I actually saw another mom in the grocery store this morning and her young son was throwing a fit from the shopping cart. He wanted all of the balloons at the check out stand, apparently. She apologized to the cashier and bagger, then eventually turned around and apologized to me as her son continued to cry and scream. I told her not to sweat it. I have a 3yo at home and she does NOT care that I am 36 weeks pregnant, and we’ve been there before with meltdowns and tantrums. My heart went out to her.

    In terms of what makes me an awesome mom, I guess I would say I am versatile. I have a lot of hobbies – dance, guitar, writing, yoga and other exercise, etc. on top of working from home – and a few of them I have pushed myself to dive into so that my kids can see that they too can pursue whatever they want.

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:28 am

      I catch myself apologizing when Margs is extra loud at the grocery store or when we’re out. It sucks because I know she’s just being a kid but at the same time I hate to feel like people around me think my kid is badly behaved.

      Versatility is awesome. Thanks for sharing!

  18. February 13, 2017 / 8:13 pm

    Very nice post and good for your friend for turning it around and making you see how you are awesome. It is hard as a Mum because often our children and our partners do not pat us on the back the way we are patted on the back in the workplace. I am now a Granny and I see my daughter going through all the things I went through with young children. It is important work and you are an “Awesome ” Mom!

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:23 am

      You’re absolutely right! Thank you for sharing Anne!

  19. February 14, 2017 / 1:31 am

    Thank you for this! Good reminder for all of us new parents 🙂

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:23 am

      My pleasure!

  20. February 14, 2017 / 4:54 am

    A lady stopped me in a shop the other day and told that me that she had been watching me and my four year old son and she had to stop me to tell me what a polite boy she thought he was. She said that it’s important to tell parents what an amazing job they’re doing. In November, our daughter was stillborn and I have struggled through the past months constantly trying to make my son smile and to keep and maintain a happy environment for him and I always doubt myself and question if I am doing enough. This lady will never know how important her words were to me. She reminded me that I am an awesome parent. We should all be telling eachother this more. x

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:22 am

      I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss. I’m a rainbow mom – I suffered 5 losses prior to welcoming my daughter into the world and I totally understand what you mean by the importance of those words.

      I’m so so sorry for your loss.

  21. February 14, 2017 / 8:01 am

    Wow, this is a powerful article and great way to think of things! I am an awesome mom because despite the ups and downs, I try to maintain a stable and safe haven for my children!

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:21 am

      Such a great reason!

  22. February 14, 2017 / 8:11 am

    Love this and you’re right we are too hard on ourselves. But here goes… I’m an awesome mama because no matter how tired I am I go into his room every morning with a big smile and a loving good morning to start the day off with positive vibes (even though some days don’t end up that way, at least I’m trying). And I’m awesome because I tell him every day (several times) that I LOVE him!!

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:20 am

      I love this! You are an awesome momma!

  23. February 14, 2017 / 8:15 am

    Love this. Life is messy and some days we might drop the ball, but hey that’s life. I think as parents we are so hard on ourselves. I bet if most of us actually said out loud all ways we felt we failed today, someone would laugh at us. So what we had Cheetos for breakfast today, nobody died and if that’s the worst thing I do today I think I’m doing all right. The fact that we even had time for breakfast is an accomplishment in itself. 🙈

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:20 am

      Absolutely! Thank you for sharing!

    • February 14, 2017 / 8:19 am

      Thank you for the love 🙂

  24. February 14, 2017 / 9:09 am

    I am an awesome parent because I somehow manage to keep waking up each morning loving my 8 year old daughter who i am convinced just skipped the whole 8 years old thing and jump right into being a snotty teenager.
    I am an awesome mother because today we were only a tiny bit late for school.
    I am an awesome mother because I am a mom and no matter how stressful some days are, I wouldn’t trade it for the world. Because no matter how hard or stressful some days are it’s totally Worth just one giggle or smile from my daughter.

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:41 am

      These are such great reasons <3

  25. February 14, 2017 / 12:55 pm

    Why is this so hard!? Proof that mom’s just don’t give themselves enough. Let’s see….I’m awesome because ….I’m supportive and let my little wildflower be herself and I keep her smiling.

    • February 14, 2017 / 3:02 pm

      It’s SO hard. Like I said, she caught me off guard and I just couldn’t verbalize anything – proof that we really take our roles as mums for granted.

  26. February 14, 2017 / 5:47 pm

    Glitter gluing all week long thanks I needed to hear this 😘😘😘

  27. February 14, 2017 / 6:49 pm

    Such a great post!!! Balance is so important !

    • February 14, 2017 / 10:05 pm

      Thank you!

  28. February 14, 2017 / 7:51 pm

    One day I went before the two teachers (one a sub) my Granddaughter Anais had, for a Parent Teachers meeting.
    We shot the breeze and then what appeared to be a critical comment was made about Anais always making light of things. Immediately I was full of excuses for her, it was my fault I said, for I always feared that she would grow up to be one of these folk who would take matters too seriously, so I suppose I should have taught her to be more serious. Well, can you picture the scene, both teachers pounced on me; “Oh no, Mr. Oquendo…..” they had been complimenting that facet of her personality, her strength in not taking things too seriously.
    We never know, yes we never know.
    Thanks for this insightful post.

    • February 14, 2017 / 10:05 pm

      I love this. Thank you for sharing!

      • February 15, 2017 / 11:53 am

        The memory retrieved by your post. Welcome

  29. February 15, 2017 / 7:41 pm

    Jenny, this is an absolutely awesome posting. We, as mothers, never stop to realize how much we contribute to our children’s lives. So many of us pack up our lives in the midst of countless struggles and abuse to move to a place of peace where healing and restoration can occur. We are awesome moms because we put our children and their welfare first. God bless you and your family!

    • February 17, 2017 / 7:48 am

      Thank you so much for your kind words! 🙂

  30. ladyinthemountains
    February 19, 2017 / 4:22 pm

    This was an amazing post and I thank you for sharing it. We all are hard on ourselves and parenting is so difficult. I constantly try to tell young moms what I see that they are doing right.
    Now for me? My kids are now 26, 22, and 19. I am an awesome mom because I have always accepted them for their individuality. I have listened to them. I have shown interest in their passions, even if they bored me to death. Some of those things have become passions of mine, too. My kids all know they can come to me about everything and the girls do. I have heard many things from my adult and teen children that made me uncomfortable but they all know that no matter what I will love them and support them. They also have always known that there are consequences to actions but I knew they would make mistakes or bad choices. They mostly learned by natural consequences. They have all thanked me all through their lives for being their mom. I am the luckiest in the world.

    • February 20, 2017 / 3:02 pm

      I can feel the love in this. Thank you so so much for sharing!

  31. February 20, 2017 / 7:37 am

    I have 4 girls 13 to 23; I constantly look at the things I could do better. But I am an awesome mum because I fight for what my kids need even though sometimes it feels like I am fighting the whole world. I am an awesome mum because I’m strict; very strict, but I’m honest with them and always allow discussion and negotiation. I must be an awesome mum because my four autistic girls are praised for their manners and their abilities everywhere they go and I have at least not let the world squash that out of them.

    • February 20, 2017 / 3:00 pm

      I love this! Thank you so much for sharing!

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